I Don't Want To Be Encouraged

Some weeks I just don't get it. I ended off last week with a message at the church (reading it in Dagbani) and hosted great people at my house. I was encouraged and ready to persevere...and then...I don't know. I can't be blaming every thing on spiritual warfare. There is something in me. Whiney-ness? Too busy-ness? Unorganized-ness? Discouraged-ness? (Hmmm, kind of like Dagbani where I make up my own words. haha)

Whatever it was/is, I go back and forth with "I'm done" and "ok, let me just try one more day" or "there is no way" and "rejoice always". I have good people around me that I can call and talk to. There are teammates here who I pray with. I have prayer partners in different countries to talk with and share with. I email people who email. Those are great, I am so thankful. I try to stay positive and push myself...but talking with Damary yesterday, I just ended up sobbing. Maybe because she knows how it is here. Maybe because she has tried to learn Dagbani too. Maybe because it was just wonderful to talk with her. Whatever it was, I was a mess.

I told her I am going home. I quit. I had 2 people yesterday tell me I really need to work on my Dagbani, one even said, "you should try and learn Dagbani". Yep, that is how good I am. I mean, let's be real, you guys, it has been 3 years and I can barely manage a back and forth conversation. Yeah, I can preach a message when someone puts it into Dagbani for me. But everyday life? Nope. It does not come. I think the time has come to evaluate some things. I just don't know. I have not said a word to my team. I know they will rally around and encourage me. They all think I am being hard on myself. I am not. I am being honest with myself. And then all that encouragement, ugh...sometimes I just do not want to hear it.

The thing is, I told myself that I do not want to live here if I can not speak the language. Yes, lots of people do it. Yes, English speakers can manage just fine. But, I guess I had ideas of grandeur, ideas of talking with people on a deeper level. POOF! Dream gone! Or...do I work another 3 years? Come on. Let's not kid ourselves. It cannot keep on like this. Don't laugh but the words in that song sung by Kenny Rogers, "You gotta know when to fold 'em." :)

I probably should say something to my team leader. And I will, next week. I know what he will say and it will encourage me blah, blah, blah... not in the mood for encouragement.

So, don't you all go and get any ideas. Let me "Scrooge" around. Don't worry, the next minute I am upbeat. It is so weird. Thankfully, God is always good. Always faithful. He never wavers. I cling to Him, as always. Life is hard. It is for everyone.

Thanks for praying.

People People People

Was all ready to start a disciplined week last Monday but...hmmm...people happened :)

So, on Tuesday my friend Yvonne was passing thru and she stayed the night. Great talks. Then Thursday, Vronny and Nadine from Gushegu came over. On Friday, I spent time at the hospital with Abdulai, who is also from Gushegu, with his son. Abdulai was made aware that his son is having difficulty seeing the board at school. That made Abdulai nervous because he went blind in his 20s and doesn't want that for his son. But the doctor said the kid just needs glasses. YAY!

Friday afternoon a family from Gushegu arrived to stay the weekend: Dr. Gerbon, his wife Dorien and their 2 kids. They are from Holland and have been in Gushegu for a few years. More great talks.

In the midst of all the cooking and arranging I had 3 Dagbani lessons and preached today at a church by reading my talk, which was put together with Augustine's help. I was told they could understand me and was even asked to come and speak to the women's group once a month.

I am tired but not exhausted. People do fire me up but I know when my last guests leave I will be taking a nap :)

It is nice to have a house that is lived in.

More Dagbani this week. I think grammar stuff.

Thanks for praying!

God Is Good Whether I Feel Like It Or Not

I do not know if I was ready as I thought I was when I got back to Tamale. Maybe I was living on the love of Accra friends wanting me to stay or burger places that taste like burgers. Maybe I was being nostalgic when talking with friends I used to work with or feeling like a proud auntie at another friend's baby. Whatever it was, I did not settle in well.

Maybe it started with my to-do list not doing! It takes so long for things to get done. For example, I want to put Damary's air conditioner in my room. I called the ac guy. No answer. I called him the next day and left a whataspp message and text. No response. So, I found a number of a new guy. I call him and he says ok. I told him I need to buy a voltage stabilizer because our power is so all over the place. (That is another complaint.) He tells me a kind I should buy. I went to town looking for it. I found others but he said they are not good. So, I ask him to look for it. He does not call me the next day, i call him. He can't find it either but tells me he will find other people to find it. (Sigh) On Saturday, he calls me and tells me where it is but I was having our team meeting at my house and cooking Thanksgiving dinner so I could not get it. And, now, it is a week later.... I would tell you another to-do-list-taking-forever-thing but I think you will get your fill of complaints in this post. Sorry!

It has been really hot. The weather has just switched over to the dry Harmattan season, which I love but in this switching process I had headaches everyday. Weird. I don't remember that in previous years. Also, another weird-- I have had a hard time falling asleep at night. No, I do not take naps or drink caffeine. Hmmm...maybe it has just been too hot. But with Harmattan coming in the nights will be cooler.

Since I was not sleeping well and things were not getting accomplished and several power outages, I was not doing my quiet times. Talk about a game changer (in a bad way)! Wooo-weeee, it was one of those thank-God-I'm-single-so-noone-has-to-be-in-the-wake-of-my-wrath sort of weeks.

Even on Thanksgiving, I really tried to be thankful and went over all my good things but my heart was not in it. I did it anyways. God is good whether I feel like it or not.

I hosted our team meeting and cooked a Thanksgiving feast. I was the only Westerner. I had to explain what stuffing was and where to put the cranberries :). It was a nice time. And another bonus for being single: you don't have to share leftovers! Haha! I guess I am thankful for something.

Ok, but I am already psyching myself to get back on track-- Jesus track, Dagbani track, and thankfulness track.

Keep on praying. Love you.

P.S. DooShik asked/told me I need to do my Level 3 evaluation this month. I shrugged my shoulders and said ok. Not because I will pass but because it will help me figure out where I am and how I can improve. I am soooooo done with Dagbani!! Ahhhh!

Grrrrreat Great Great!

You guys...

You guys. I have just had a very relaxing week. I feel ready (as much as I can be) to head back to Tamale. I am so thankful I don't have the crushed-brain feeling or exhaustion that i came with.

I had a great time with my friend and sister Baaba. When she did not have to go to work we went out to eat, trotro-ed around and talked a lot. She and I are so different and yet we get on well. She cooked wonderful meals for me and the girls combed my hair. Does life get better than that?

I met up with other friends. I had really good talks. I hope I encouraged them as they encouraged me. I am so thankful that even though I live in Tamale, I still get to live life with my friends in Accra.

I napped, ate, internetted (word??), prayed, relaxed, read books, talked with old friends.

I fly back north to Tamale tomorrow. I have a long, long list ready for me to attack this week.

Let's get to it! Thanks for praying!

They Understood

I was able to have two lessons with Augustine before my Bible study. And the verdict? The girls could understand! Yay! A few sentences had to be re-translated by a girl who can speak English but other than that, it was clear. They even discussed afterwards, even though I couldn't keep up with their talking. And, I love how God uses me in this because I always say things that I never plan to. I was talking about Abraham and said he wasn't always perfect but God kept with him. We reviewed the previous stories and took note that in this story he obeyed. He did not waver. He was spending time with God and trusting Him more. That was for me. Even before teaching this story, I was thinking I shouldn't because I am just not faithful like Abraham and his obedience in almost sacrificing Isaac. But Abraham was old! Like 100! So, I got me some time...hahaha lol. I love how God works in us. He is so patient with us! With me!

I came down to Accra and am staying at a small, but cute room with Airbnb. The place has a pool! That was the clincher for me. I have slept in, swam, got a pedi-manicure, napped, just went at my own pace. It has been lovely. Tomorrow I will go to church and then go to Baaba's house and stay there for the week.

So thankful to recharge. So thankful!

    Just Keep Going

    How do I sum up the week in a nutshell? Hot n' whiney? Ups n' downs? Bring it n' I quit? Whatever the case, I got thru it.

    I only had 2 language lessons but each one was great. I did my Bible study in Dagbani but...one girl came right out and said, "I didn't hear anything." Meaning she couldn't understand me. Sigh...

    I had a good time whenever I met with Rafia. Somehow we can keep a conversation going though she always ends up laughing with something I say. (Farm and stomach are the same word here. Think of a conversation mixing them.)

    I had a good time with Martha. She told me she really wants to know God and her Bible. I was like, "Awesome! Let's do it!"

    My translator at my Bible study, Samuel, and his wife, Christiana had a baby boy. They had a naming ceremony on Saturday. I was to drive her from the house to the church. Then, the woman who was supposed to hold the baby and give it to the pastor in the church to declare the name, was not ready. They asked me to do it. This is a respected gesture! I was so honoured. So, we drove to the church then I sat next to them holding the baby until the pastor finished his short talk and was to announce the name the parents had given. They named him Godwin Yemkana. Afterwards I ran around taking pictures.

    My colleague Yvonne came over for a couple days and it was so nice to have someone to dump on! I love iron sharpening iron. She has been an encouragement to me.

    In between these times was a lot of sweating and headaches. I dont think I drank enough water. It has been 100 degrees daily. I haven't slept well. I need to move the air conditioner that we put in Damary's room to my room. Sheesh! Can I say Pile. Of. Sweat? Ugh and gross.

    Language practice...so hard. At least I can catch more words. Yay! But still cannot grasp conversations unless they talk to me like a preschooler. Boo. Lots of questions and whining to the Lord about continuing...but I also don't want to be a quitter. Always so back and forth. Your necks must be sore going back and forth and back and forth to my swings.

    Anyways. Another week. God can do it...I sure can't.

    Thanks for praying!

    Tamale, Cakes, and Prayer

    Back in Tamale. I have gotten a lot of things accomplished. I love-me-crossing-things-off-my-to-do-list!

    I had a bit of a scare. Augustine, who I want to help me with language, seemed to tell me indirectly that he would not be able to help me with lessons. Oi!! I was so down and discouraged because that was a big reason for me to not go back to Gushegu. I talked with him later this week and it seems we will work out some times when I can come. PHEWWWW!!

    My friend Martha has two kids and I told her when that when I come back to Tamale they could come over and make birthday cakes for themselves. I did one for Edith in May. Her brother, Mathias turned 5 in October. They had a ball and while we waited for the cakes to bake we watched some Bible cartoons and read books, ate some rice and stew and tried to make them see that my dogs are kind :)

    Let me share with you something Jesus spoke to me thru His Word. It is so perfect. I wrote it down and read it nearly every day. It sums things up.

    Sherri,

    Rejoice in Me. Again, let me say it, Rejoice! Do not be anxious about anything. Do not be anxious about language or circumstances. But instead, with gratitude and thanksgiving tell me your requests and I will give you peace to guard your heart and your mind in Me. And take your mind and think on things that are honorable, pure, commendable, just, true, lovely, excellent, worthy of praise and the God of peace will be with you. When your mind is stayed on Me, I will keep you in perfect peace. Trust in me. I am an everlasting rock. And Sherri, when you are walking in darkness and have no light, continue to walk in obedience. Trust in Me and on your God.

    And I know things are hard right now. You feel I make your teeth grind on gravel and you cower in ashes. You say, "my soul has no peace" or "I have forgotten what happiness is". You tell Me your endurance is finished and you have no hope in Me.

    Sherri, I do remember your affliction and see you wandering. I know your soul is bowed down. I love that you still say, " The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning, great is your faithfulness. The Lord is my portion says my soul. Therefore, I will hope in Him."

    Sherri, I am good to those who wait for Me. To those whose soul seeks Me. It is good that you wait quietly for my salvation. I will not cast you off forever. Though there is grief, I will have compassion according to the abundance of my steadfast love. And remember Sherri, my steadfast love is great.

    Back to language this coming week. Thanks for praying! Love you.

    Rejoice Always

    It seems by Friday I was ready to leave Gushegu. Though the language is so hard, I think I enjoyed the people these past few weeks. I laughed a lot and sat longer with certain people. I was happy to want to sit with them. That is progress! I met some new women. I kind of wish I could've met them sooner. They were so kind. They let me pound fufu a little bit with them.

    Yes, some days after sitting with people and not understanding a thing I would cry...underneath my sunglasses asking God if this is really what I am supposed to be doing. But then, the next morning came around and I was ready to get back out there. I really don't get it. God's work. That's all I can figure.

    I met a gal from Wisconsin this week! She married a Korean man who's brother and family are missionaries 45 minutes away from Gushegu in a different village. Ahn and Hannah (Hannah is the one from Madison, Wisconsin) will go to missionary training school in February and then they hope to come back out to Ghana. Ahn and his brother and the family came to see Fela and Puii and let the kids all play together. Such a small world!

    Coming back to Tamale, I find myself so tired. And my house...oh, those ants have won a few battles I have to admit :( I have a lot of small-small things to take care of now that I am back here. The problem is that those things take time, which distracts me from language and I feel guilty for not working hard enough blah blah blah... but I have dogs that have flies all over them, a water tank that could get a hole because of the foundation it is on has cracked, ants and cobwebs galore, food in my freezer that needs to get used up, fans that don't work well, my car's air con that needs to be fixed, and Damary's room that needs to be put right.

    Where do I start?

    With prayer. Jesus told me this morning to Rejoice always, Rejoice. I will do that too.

    Love you. Thanks for praying! Rejoice.

    Nothin' New

    So, how is it going you ask? Fine. Ho-hum. This progress is ridiculous. But at least I can say progress right?

    Maybe the way God is using the prayers of people are me to just keep coming to Him. Maybe He just wants me to cling to Him. Of course He does. I guess, it takes language to hold me there.

    Uplifting times: -- Abdulai from church was needing a phone and thru help of others we got him one. I downloaded an app so it talks back to him. Very annoying to me but when you are blind it is very helpful! If he gets a text it speaks out what it says. Or when a call comes in it tells you the caller. So cool! I know people in the USA who have disabilities and it is difficult. But to have disabilities here! There is almost no help. And Abdulai is a Christian and so his family doesn't help him out very much. And yet, this guy praises God. Wow. Fela, my missionary colleague said when he thinks life is hard he goes and sits with Abdulai and he gets a refreshed perspective. I have experienced the same thing.

    One of my gifts is serving and the church had a clean up day. It was nice to be doing something instead of language. At least with cleaning you can see how well you do and the progress. I'm glad I could be part of that.

    Funny times: -- The things people say to me. One woman told me I could have a bigger behind (because theirs is large and, well, the bigger the better here) by walking more. Another woman told me I look like a small girl because my breasts are still up. Hmmm...it's the bra lady.

    I got a cold for a few days this week. For Christmas last year my sister in law got me Kleenex with lotion. I am so thankful! I'm sure my nose would have been bleeding with all the sneezing and runniness. So thankful I was only suffering for two days. Then I got back out there and suffered outside...hahahaa...language joke. Serious but not serious :)

    I have one week left here. I think it will be my last. I will go back to stay in Tamale. I will sit with Augustine, my new language helper and try again to make progress. The hard part will be hanging out with non English speakers. May I visit some of my old friends! I gotta keep practicing. That is key.

    Love you. Thanks for praying.

    Abdulai and his son. And then just a pic of what it looks like walking around.

    'ING' Ending Is So Simple But Means So Much

    Are you getting a little nauseous as we go from one week high to the next low and then high and then low...and throw a couple twists in there too. This week we got a high! It is like my hands are raised as I am on the rollercoaster enjoying, screaming, "Woo-hoo!"

    Before I came back to Tamale I texted a young man named Augustine. He is a brother of Pastor Andrew. He has helped other missionaries in the past with Dagbani. He has other jobs so I did not know if he would have time for me. But he responded that I could come and he would give me some lessons.

    He is language helper #6. LOL! Each helper has had strengths. Augustine has grammar strength which is exactly, exactly what I need at this point. On Monday I really thought I would cry when he explained why a certain ending was given. The ending was equivalent to "ing". ING, people! How simple, but no one could explain that to me. He also states sentences that I should translate in the Dagbani English. For example, to say "I use my nose to smell" Dagbani English would say "Nose my use to hear" (yes, your nose hears). So, Augustine has helped many English speakers and has learned how we say things and helps us to make understandable sentences. He helped me translate my Bible study for the girls into Dagbani and the girls were so proud of me! Yay!

    You guys, this is a HUGE answer to prayer! HUGE. Just typing this the tears want to fall. I am encouraged.

    Because of this, I have decided to take what Augustine has taught me and practice in Gushegu for the next 3 weeks. Then I will come back to Tamale and start more consistent lessons with him and try to keep moving forward. I will stay in Tamale to learn and see which ministry God has in store for me. It will be hard to learn in Tamale but I just need to be diligent in whom I spend my time with. No need to worry about it now. Let me just get through another 3 weeks practicing in Gushegu.

    Please, dont be thinking I've got this. I still have far to go. I mean, it took 3 years to learn an ending! Ugh...

    Love you guys!

    Brother Augustine teaching me.

    Not Equal?? Grrr...

    A very up and down week. After my amazing weekend with friends I really thought I was refreshed and ready to go. But it seems Monday came and I was all lead in my feet. I went out, but I was not happy about it. I forced myself after every lame conversation to just try for the next one. I came home with tears, thankfully hidden by a very dark pair of sunglasses.

    The next days were much better, I mean, it could not get worse than Monday. On Wednesday this one new woman I met just last week, had a group of men next to her. She sells rice so they were buying. I met one of them previously and he speaks English to me. They all were greeting me and asking me questions. To be funny, I said that my husbands are fine. They were like what? I said that I have 4 husbands just like men have many wives here. The one English speaking one was like no way, women can't do that, blah, blah, blah. I said to him that he doesn't think I am his equal? He said No. Men are higher than women. I said so my brain and your brain are different? My heart and your heart are different? My blood and your blood are different? And I was so angry I got up and said something like well I cannot sit here and talk with you since were are not equal and I laughed (to make it seem like I was fine) and walked away. Sad, because I enjoyed sitting with this woman and will no longer. Also, unbelievably angry at the men here. I may have stomped off as I looked back on it. As I walked off I sensed the Spirit say I was to love them. He brought to mind the Good Samaritan. I was so on fire with anger! I did not want to hear this! But I have done nothing to earn this love that has been given me. So, as I walked I prayed. And I prayed I would love them. And I praised God in the midst of it all.

    Not easy. But so much better than stewing in my wrath.

    I met some new ladies this week. One told me to come to her house and read the Bible for her. Really??! I hope I understood her because Imma-coming!

    I came back to Tamale on Thursday. I went to the market on Friday to buy food because it was my turn to host our team meeting. I made chili over rice and a cucumber salad with pineapple crisp. I never know how to estimate for a crowd and I think if Damary would have been there she would have told me to cook more rice. I barely had enough. Live and learn. (And, I still miss Damary.) We had a time of prayer with the team and heard answers to prayers. All so encouraging. Love 'em.

    Love you too! Thanks for praying!

    Two Girls

    Thank you for praying for me at church. God saw me! You know, speaking in front of people is not difficult for me but this time...hey...I was shaking! When I was reading the Dagbani Bible my hand was trembling. I would like to blame that on the power of God's Word but it was more nervousness :)

    The rest of the week was more and more language and it was hard and one day I was even talking to myself to keep moving. I then realized I was making a loop and it would be shorter for me to just keep going than to turn around. Ha! If I was to write a progress report I would say I can hear when I don't pronounce things well. I can put more sentences together. I am learning new vocabulary, not using it, but still. And I am able to say dialogues smoother than before. Unfortunately, it is easier for me to keep looking at how far I need to go. Towards the end of the week i was feeling tired, brain tired. I was glad to hop a bus on Thursday and go to Tamale to meet a couple friends.

    These friends:

    Sara. I met Sara about 13 years ago as she and another girl, from Canada, were studying at a theological school in Accra. For some reason, we all were in Tamale and we met. Sara has kept in touch with me. She is now a professor at a university in Germany. She was here in Ghana with students...and in Tamale! She has been praying for me and what God is doing here all these many years and to see her again brought joy joy joy! We spent the afternoon together catching up and talking about how God has answered prayers. I was so encouraged. So encouraged!

    Charity. Charity is a SIM Ghana missionary serving in the Upper West Region. She actually first came out as a short termer in 2009. Now she came back in 2016 to stay :). You know how I talk about Damary and I being so different? Well, Charity and I are so similar! We pray over the phone every 2 weeks. She also had to learn a language and just completed her level 3! She stopped in Tamale for the night to fly to Accra as she is going on Home Assignment. Our short time together brought laughter, as always, vulnerability and accountability, which I need, and more joy joy joy! So thankful for her speaking into my life and praying for me. She knows exactly the pains of learning a crazy language:).

    I am so thankful for this burst of sweet fellowship with these girls. I am ready to get back to Gushegu and try again. I feel fueled by our laughter and prayers. (I am actually sitting on the bus right now and it just started up!)

    Thanking God for his goodness goodness goodness!

    Thanks for praying!

    People Are Praying--Yay!

    I sent off a prayer letter at the beginning September asking people to pray for me every day. I know people are doing it. I can feel it. I have been going a week and I still want to keep going. I sensed progress. I learned something new and then caught it in conversation. Of course, I'm not running around the end of a rainbow, I had hard days too :)

    The Dutch couple were able to bring back some allergy meds. Yay! But it may take some time for them to kick in. The eye drops help, though one night I woke up and rubbed my eye and the next morning I looked like I was sparring with Rocky. I tried to keep sunglasses on so people wouldn't ask too many questions. And, yesterday as I was out, I was so tired. As I sat with people I hardly said a word. Then I went to sit under a tree with some kids and a lady. The lady told me she was going in her compound and I told her I like the breeze and would remain. Then as she left, it occurred to me that in the morning I took 2 allergy pills which brings drowsiness. Duh! No wonder I'm a zombie walking around with my eyes glazed over... but at least they were not itching! But, yeah, not much accomplished that day.

    There is a gal named Cara from the UK visiting. She is interested in missions. She has spent some time seeing different ministries and talking to us. Her background is physiotherapy. I have enjoyed listening to her observations. When you stay out here for so long everything becomes normal. And then she starts talking about cobwebs in the hospital and people laying on the floors. Oh, yeah, that is not nice or normal. There were other things too and I went to bed telling Jesus that I am so thankful for being rich. So stinkin' amazingly rich...for no reason. Just grace. And just so I can bless others.

    As I ride my bicycle into town every day I do ask God that he would make me a light and that I would love whomever I come near. I also know He is here in Gushegu and ask Him to show me where He is working so I can join Him.

    I preach tomorrow at church. My theme is "The God who sees me" using Genesis chapter 16. Every day I am out I tell myself the truth that God sees me. I will read the Bible chapter in Dagbani and say my first paragraph in Dagbani and then do my closing prayer in Dagbani too. I have it all written out. Let's see how it goes!

    Thanks for praying!

    Bye Bye Damary

    Time kept moving and the day came for Damary to go. She was so nervous at the airport. I usually am too when about to fly. We had a couple fun outings in our last weekend but the best part of everything was after she checked her bags at the airport. Then we went to eat and talked. We shared a bunch of things we love about the other person. We talked about how each other's strengths made the other one grow. And we talked about the funny times too! Man, I will miss her. And days later I have already sent her text messages and audio messages etc, etc. I am thankful she was in my life in Tamale.

    • She owed me a head massage.

    Thursday I drove to Gushegu. I sat and talked with Vronny and found out her father is not doing well. He hasn't been well for years but now he had a stroke. Friday morning she heard that he passed away. She was able to get a flight on Saturday and get back to Switzerland. The Dutch couple here needed to go to a meeting in Tamale so they left and put me in charge of their sheep, chickens and cats. I realize, again, how much I hate smelly, hairy animals. Haha. And then Fela and Puii have traveled down to Accra. So, it seems I am the only 'Siliminga' around here. At church they said, "Wunizooya, you are the only white person."

    The rains did not really come in August and farmers were nervous for their crops but the rain is really consistent now. And with the rains come my allergies. Ooooo they are really bad this year. Even the weekend in Accra I was drugged on pills and trying not to claw my eyes out. The Dutch couple who went to Tamale said they will bring back some good stuff to help with that. I am so thankful. Sometimes I can't help but itch my eyes and they get so puffy I cant see my eyelashes because they are sucked in. LOL.

    I had a couple days of language and realize I need to branch out to find more non English speakers. My progress is so slow yet I'm not down and out. I know that God sees me.

    Thanks for praying!

    Always Thanks For Praying

    I was in Accra last week for a youth camp called Higher Purpose 2019. This was the first year. I joined in on Thursday evening and heard the opening speeches from the CEO and a Rev minister. The camp is not Christian centred or academic centred. It is a mix of everything. They had a talk on Robotics, English, counselling, health (that was me) and other topics. They went out on excursions to see different areas of Ghana. They had free wifi! They had a time for games and painting. I mean, it was everything crammed into a few days. I kept thinking these kids are going to fall over with exhaustion but they were so into every speaker and event. I was really proud to be a part of something so well organized, so different from any other camp and so much fun. There were kids from every region. Even two children from Gushegu! Yes, I practiced my Dagbani a bit. We all slept in tents and had air mattresses. We had beautiful weather. I got to go with half of the students group to visit the Accra zoo and other places of Accra. Some I have seen before and some were new to me. To these students, I think it was all new to them. Thenks for praying!

    This past week I was in Tamale. I spent a few days with Rafia. I did one day of administration and another day of running errands.

    We had a team meeting on Saturday in Buipe which is where some of my colleagues are. It is less than 1.5 hours away. I had a car of people and Fela and Puii had their car with the girls. We were about a half hour behind them. Getting near the destination, Damary got a call and looked at me and says that Puii is telling us not to come there are armed robbers. I pulled the car over and Dooshik got out to talk with people in the village that we stopped at. They were able to get a number and call police patrol. Within 15 minutes police were there. We slowly moved forward and when we reached the place of the robbery the security were in full force. Unfortunately, it was too late. Thankfully no one was hurt. The bad guys with AK-47s apparently stopped a line of cars and made the drivers all get out and lay on the ground. They took phones and money. Puii was able to stay in the car with the girls who were oblivious to it all. Another praise. When the men left, Fela, though shocked, drove the few kilometres to Buipe and got to our teammates home. We arrived later and they shared the whole story. How awful! They got money stolen and Puii's phone but they are physically safe. Randomly we hear of this but this one is so blatant and out in the open and no one was wearing masks. It was 10 am. We already have security measures in place for our team. I am so well cared for here! But we will take extra measures. This road to Buipe has been getting worse. Tamale still feels very safe to me and I am thankful. Thanks for always praying for me.

    Lots of Goodbyes for Damary as she will fly to Accra on Friday. I will go with and take her to the airport on Monday. I cant believe her 3 years are finished! Ei!

    Keep praying. Will do language this week. Love you all.

    Ashamed

    I did not write last week because we were celebrating Fela and Puii's baby girl naming ceremony. They do naming ceremonies here in the Northern Region. They gave her an English name- Mercy. They gave her a Northeast Indian name- which I cannot pronounce. And now they gave her a Dagbani name - Daliri. It means good fortune. This girl is so cute! Reverend DooShik gave a message in Dagbani for all to hear the gospel. There was food and lots of people. It did not rain (it is rainy season). It was great to see the missionaries in the midst of the community. I am very thankful to see strong relationships. Some of the women from church came to cook. Some neighbors cleaned. The men Fela sit with all came and sat and laughed. (Such a man thing! Ha! :)) I asked Fela and Puii how they thought it went and they just heaved out a tired sigh and said they enjoyed it but are glad it's over.

    Ok...let's be honest...the real reason I did not write was because I was ashamed. Ashamed at my bad attitude. Ashamed at letting 2 days pass in Gushegu and not really learning anything. Ashamed of all my whining. Ashamed I return to Tamale and people wonder if I am learning anything in Gushegu. It was/is hard and discouraging and I just make it worse by being miserable.

    So, Monday thru Wednesday came around and I was determined and prayed and did all I could but...nothing. Of course, you will tell me I got more out of it than nothing, but I felt like nothing is sinking in. Nothing is coming out. Nothing is making sense. But I just keep at it.

    Thursday was just another day but I really think people were praying for me because I had so much VIM! I was out almost the whole day. I sat with some new ladies. I forced myself to put sentences together. I just couldn't figure out why I was enjoying this :) but did not dwell on it because I wanted the attitude/ feeling to stay!

    Friday was not bad. I had lots of good opportunities but felt my ears closed up again and I couldn't grasp anything. Sigh...

    Back to Tamale. I leave for Accra on Wednesday to help with a camp. They had to modify the week so I really am not doing very much. One aerobics work out in the morning and then a talk on health. I should be back to Tamale on Sunday.

    Sorry you have to read my whinings...actually you dont have to! But thanks for making it to the end. Just know that I am ok. I will still keep at it. I need prayers. God loves me. There is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And I will hope!

    Thanks. Love you.

    Still So Hard

    So, I was in Gushegu this week. My heart was sooooo not there. I had to drag my feet to get out and talk with people. One day it rained the whole day so I was happy to sit in the house and listen to my recordings and review past dialogues. But the other days, phewwwww pure force. Pure grit of teeth. Pure fighting against the flesh of laziness. And then that lovely bicycle...ooooo how my butt does not like it! It seems it takes time to get used to it and by the time I do I head back to Tamale! I head back to Gushegu on Wednesday and am not looking forward to getting back on it. But it is much better than walking, so I will try to be thankful for it :)

    I had to come back for our team meeting on Saturday, which always is encouraging. There are many of us in language learning so we all can be miserable together, I mean, we can all encourage each other!! Ha Ha! I am now the only missionary from the West (Europe or America). Everyone else is from other countries. I am the minority! I love how other parts of the world are taking up the call of God and serving Him in his kingdom! WooHoo!

    That is about it for the week. Still fighting the flesh. Still living in discontent, even though I know God is so good. I know He is faithful. I know He gives me everything I need for the day. I know, I know, I know...but I think I am too passive to care right now. I am worn out by language. I still do not see the end of the tunnel and I am wondering how I can keep going. I want to be faithful, I do. But maybe I need to be real too. Maybe I am just one of those people...(I hear my Auntie Ruby yelling at me right now)

    Anyways, I will press on. Keep praying. Love you. Thanks so much!

    Holiday Finished & Kid's Outing

    Ok, in regards to my last post...we did not end up staying at the beach place. They had no kitchen and so we had to get a taxi and go to town. Our showers were a bucket of water, which the staff made a face, when I asked them to bring it to our bathroom. Our toilet had no water. The water that was not used for the shower could be poured down the toilet to flush it. Our lock inside our room was a nail that you pulled down to keep the door from banging open. Our car was parked in someone's home. The mosquito nets had holes and there was no way to climb into bed without getting sand in the bed. Not exactly the restful beach stay we were expecting. So, I called a friend who had a friend and we got rooms to a different place about 2 hours away. It was 5 dollars over our budget but we didn't care, we really wanted outta there. Wait...one more thing...our breakfast, that was included, consisted of us walking to town to buy local porridge, which none of us like, and costs about 5 cents per person. We were like...that's ok.

    So, then we headed to our next place and it was a gem! It was on Lake Volta. We had adjoining rooms and a pool. It was serene. It was just what everyone needed. H.E.A.V.E.N. We were so thankful.

    We got back to Accra on Monday. I did some running around with Damary because she will be leaving Ghana in September and needed to think about gifts for her family.

    We took the bus up to Tamale on Wednesday. Today, Saturday, Damary wanted to do something fun for her Sunday school kids so we took them to a pool. They spent hours in the kiddie pool. It was such fun. We had lunch and then we brought them back home. Something that is not-a-big-deal for us turns into one when you spend it with people who think it is such a big deal. I love when my perspective shifts.

    I head to Gushegu on Monday. I am fighting it. I know I need to go but quitting would be easier. Yet, I have come so far, by God's grace and your prayers, I cannot quit now. Keep praying!

    Bullet Points

    I feel like these past two weeks have been a blur. Let me just give bullet points otherwise I will go on for hours and hours.

    -- The day after I came from Gushegu, one of my girls, Deborah, from Accra came to stay with us.

    -- I drove for a friend's wedding and was even included in some of the wedding photos. Haha

    -- I did three language lessons. One was just learning praise and worship songs which was great.

    -- Deb and I came down to Accra on the bus Friday, which took a never-before 14+ hours. Ugh...at least I had someone to be angry with :)

    -- We were picked up by Baaba and Amponsah but before driving home we had to make a quick stop to greet our brother's family, who had a death.

    -- Saturday morning I had a meeting with resource people who are all participating in a youth camp in August. I had to present my outline on 'Health and Fitness'.

    -- In the afternoon, it just so happened that my ballroom club was having a party at a beach and it was not far from where my meeting was. It was fun to see everyone again.

    -- That evening I met up with another friend and ate delicious banku with Tilapia! Sometimes I amazed that I went from never liking fish to loving it.

    --Monday was my birthday. It rained heavy from 7am -12. Baaba, Amponsah and I talked the whole time. The weather was cool. We were all relaxed and chilled. In the afternoon we went out for pizza and chicken. It was lovely. Their daughter shares the bday with mine so we were able to celebrate together. Baaba got me a purse, not made of African cloth and earrings. Just being with them was a gift.

    -- I came back to the office to stay. I went out with Avi and Jules. Always a great time. Afterwards, i realized ice cream was much needed and Jules treated!

    -- When I got home, Charity and Damary were in. They took the bus down. Charity and I went to see the movie Aladdin and tried a new restaurant. For dessert, we bought doughnuts. They were legit! We had a Strawberry filled one and an Oreo filled one. Ahhhhhh! The fatness of Accra!

    -- My laptop keyboard is not working! May need to get a keyboard to plug in with USB. Some letters on my top row are not working. Sigh...

    -- Thursday morning Damary, Charity, Penny and I headed to the Volta Region for a holiday. The road was the worst in Ghana and apparently it is a main highway! Ugh...but we arrived at our lodge near Wli Falls.

    -- Wli Falls was stunning. We all loved it. Our lodge was simple but cheap and clean. The food was delicious. The ambiance and environment was wow! Spectacular!

    -- Charity and I went to climb the tallest peak in Ghana but it was really intense so we decided to save it for another time.

    -- Still with me?

    -- Then we headed to a beach place. The owner told us to take a different road, which we did and it was also very nice and the landscape was beautiful. I need to come back to the Volta. So Nice.

    -- The beach place...it is quite simple. No running water. Huts on the beach. Sand floors. The security of the place is not so good. Will have to let you know if we stay or if we go.

    -- So, that is my nutshell of the past couple weeks. And now we are coming to mid-July! TIME! Goes too fast.